That's Enough

Growing up I saw you everyday.

We walked to school, we sat next to each other in class

We even took walks sometimes at the mini park near your house

During these times I smiled, you smiled

I laughed, you laughed.. heck I even called you a jack a** the day before I left 

priceless

Then I moved. I didn't get to see you anymore.

I never got to wake up at 5 in the morning and go to seminary with you

I never got to take drivers ed with you

I never got to go on a date or even ask you to a dance for that matter..

I saw you for the first time in six years.. and when I knew that I would

get to see you and then finally seeing you.. I DIED INSIDE. nuff said.

Now the time has come where your leaving.

Two years isn't a long time.. but at the same time, I mean honestly, ha it CAN be.

We talk, and then we don't.

We talk, and then we don't.

I think just not to have been around each other as much as we would have liked has

broken our contact or communication... the way we used to be so when we do talk..

make sense?

 It's acquired haha because we don't know what to say yet at the same time, in our heads we're like: 

"blah blah blah.. this this this," (that was basically me and you really saying what we

wanna say... lol)

BUT.. even though we don't really talk and I'm here and your there and you have a girlfriend

who I hear is fantastic and I'm just Miss. Lonely in good ol' Utah...

I'm still willing to try.. even if it means getting hurt in the process; because then that means I'm strong, confident, courageous and willing to take a risk even if I'm getting my heart broken.

That's enough.. that's enough for me.

Knowing I tried and showing who I am.. is good enough.

I know who I am.. and showing you may be the worst thing I ever do or the best thing I ever do.

Either way it's worth it.

And if you don't like it.. then fine. 

I'll be sad and wish you'd change your mind..

But I'll know I did my best and stop worrying about you haha.. stop thinking so hard about you and my life with you and what would happen if this happened or this... just Chill Out.

I'll know that there is SOMEONE out there for me. And he will love me; And he will take me for who I am.

that is my testimony... amen.

ps- the two texts (and yes they were only two.. so what it still happened..) were the best :)