Last night I realized something. If my dream comes true which is to perform on stage, Broadway... will I still be a member of the best church in the entire world? Will I still hold on to what I've been taught ever since I was a child? Will I get married in the temple to a man that will be with me for all time and eternity and yet still perform on stage possibly playing a character who has a love interest....
I mean anything is possible right now, yeah I could change my mind but honestly. If you find something that you love, do it for the rest of your life. That has been my motto, that was the plan, the deal for my life. And now I'm questioning it. WTH right?
I LOVE. The church with all my heart. I love being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I don't want to leave it behind. I know exactly what will happen if I do. I've fallen off the path of righteousness plenty of times but I would never ever fall off, be so completly gone that I would just forget about it. Act like it never happened. Like I don't know who Joseph Smith is..
Frick. You rehearse everyday for hours and when you perform it's 8 shows a week (two on sat.)
I know that for a fact this is honestly the only thing I can do with my life. I don't want to teach it and watch younger kids perform. I want to be the performer... I don't want to direct or produce or be a composer.. be a dental assistant or a social worker or a finacial clerk or work at mcd.
I have never felt unsure about this. and now I am. piss.
I remember when Steven Fehr told me for over 2 years he didn't get a call back. Sometimes it sucks but if its what you love to do then get out there and I don't know record yourself singing to doing a monologue. Make work for yourself is what my filmacting teacher told me. And I know that you could do that. There are members of the church who hold fast to their standards and are still performing and doing what they love. I know you can do it too Victoria. :)
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